Broken Cookies Don't Count

The Blogging A to Z Challenge has a nifty little tradition called the Reflections Post.  It’s intended to sum up your experience with the Challenge.  It’s an outlet for us  to tell what we gained during the Challenge and maybe to let off steam just a bit.  Ok, how on Earth did we survive it?!

I’m going to be so excited to attach this colorful badge to my side bar…that is if I can remember how! I have to look it up every time which is why my side bar doesn’t change very often!

What did I think about the Challenge?

Last year, I dove in with little preparation and chugged along day by day coming up with interesting topics and handling them in an amusing way most times.

This year, several days, even early in the month I found myself thinking, “What on Earth was I thinking, why did I want to do this again?!”  This self-doubt dogged me through much of the month.  I HATE to not complete something.  That issue has dogged me throughout my life, not completing something I start.  (You should see all of the journals I’ve started and never gotten even half way through.)  I wasn’t going to let that happen to me with the Challenge.

I thought my posts were riddled with the written equivalent of a public speaker saying, “um…er…ah…” when the thought isn’t coming.  But I seem to have come up with topics which, though a bit less than cheery sometimes, gave me some pause.  Perhaps the pause was what I was looking for.  With that pause I was able to think things through, on many occasions during this Challenge.  Because of the pause, I was able to clearly see what I wanted to do, what my motivation is and how I can accomplish things.

The wonderful thing, and I’ll say this over and over, even though I’ve said it before, All of You, my readers are so supportive.  It seemed that every day when I posted something where I was feeling less than confident, less than able to handle things, your comments bolstered me.  Many of you had instances to share where you had the same doubts or anxieties. It’s amazing how we can all be so different , yet so similar in many ways.

It’s almost as if I spent a month in therapy.  Boy, was this cheaper than actually going to a therapist! It helped me to work out a lot of things that needed working out.  I’m feeling much clearer and more focused (Am I not ALWAYS searching for focus?!)  I feel I’m on my way.

I have to share with you a wonderful and supportive thing that happened throughout the Challenge.  Each day, my best friend, Gail would send me an e-mail after reading my post for the day.  In the e-mail, there would be a photo of a cat that somehow referred to the Letter and topic of my post that day.  How could I NOT complete the Challenge?  I wanted to keep getting my e-mail kitties every day! Thanks, Gail!

Summing up, I would give the Blogging A to Z Challenge, an A-Z +.  I had to use my brain and think hard, but in the end I think I made the grade.  I know it worked on the inside which is where I needed it to work.  Thanks to all who came along for the ride and Thanks to the organizers of the Challenge.  Yes, I’ll be back next year!

Happy Friday!

I can’t believe I’m saying this but…today is the LAST day of the Blogging A to Z Challenge!!  I realize that I’ve been whining a bit, well a Lot.  But I’m beginning to think that it’s been productive whining and I’m ready to go.  The Challenge has been a positive experience so let’s wrap this Up!!

Z is for Zero.  Looking up the word zero I found this as the number 3 definition:

“a mathematical value intermediate between positive and negative values.”

That works for my purposes.  I’ve been talking about positives and negatives lately.  I’ve been searching for the balance between the two.  Zero is appropriate.

But I’m also thinking of Zero in the sense of a countdown…

Five…Four…Three…Two…One…Zero…Blast Off!  I grew up in the age of the Mercury and Apollo Space programs so countdowns and blast offs are dear to me in a very special way.  I’m looking at my life right now as a countdown.  I’m going step by step to reach that Blast off point.  I’m probably nowhere near Five yet, probably hovering around Nine or if I give myself a little more credit, maybe Eight and a Half.   But I’m counting down and I will get to that Zero.

Zero gives the impression of emptiness.  I am working for a type of emptiness.  The cleaning out, removal and sale of all of these things that we don’t need anymore. When the process is completed, I want to see that wonderful open space in the middle of the Zero.  Uncluttered and unencumbered. Then it’s on to the wonderful open space and unencumbered beauty of New Mexico.

A clean slate is wonderful in my mind.  Now is the time to accomplish the task, This all reminds me very much of a poem I wrote once called Spring Cleaning.  As I write this, I have no idea where a copy of it might be, but that will be part of my project today…find a copy of that and share it with all of you.  It will fit so well with my theme here.

Without further delay, I bid Farewell to the Blogging A to Z Challenge.  I wasn’t sure where I was going with it.  I certainly didn’t think it would bring me to all of these revelations.  I’m glad I was here and I’m glad I have arrived with all of this new clarity.  Thank you to all of my readers for all of the wonderful, positive and supportive comments throughout this process.  Your comments have helped my thinking move in this direction and in directions I hadn’t expected.  It’s time to get on the road.

Five…Four…Three…Two…One…ZERO…Blast off!!

Happy Monday!

We’re almost there, We’re almost there…Ok, it’s an old Andy Williams song and many of you are too young to remember it but I couldn’t help myself.  Next to the last day…Truly, it is the next to the last day for the Blogging A to Z Challenge. The letter for the day is Y and probably not as hard as tomorrow’s letter but I struggle none the less.

I re-read last year’s Y post.  I really liked it overall as a post, but I most liked the sentiment behind it.  I am struggling with negativity over the last few weeks.  Ok, throughout the A to Z Challenge, I’ve been struggling with negativity.  I decided that I will for this one time only, repeat myself.

Re-reading last year’s post gave me a boost.  I was saying Yes to things.  I’m trying to do that now.  Not everything is negative. Even No is not negative depending on the situation.  If I can’t do something, I’m going to say No.  That’s a positive. Especially if saying Yes is going to stress me out and burden my spirit.  I’m trying to lighten up physically (that’s been successful and a story that I’ll get into after the challenge) and environmentally.  Not world environment…My environment.  I’m feeling I will get there.  By saying No to the things around me that are no longer necessary, I’m saying Yes to a positive living situation and Yes to getting on the road to where I want to be.

Saying Yes I will do something while the negativity around me is saying “that won’t work” that is a positive.  I think I can be successful and I’m going to stick with my own intuition.  I’m not going to change the world, but I will make my own world a more positive place to live.

Perhaps I’ve started my own trend.  Every time I participate in the A to Z Challenge, I think I’ll make the letter Y stand for Yes.  I like that…it’s a positive idea.  Now I need to go out and make every day a positive Yes day.

You have the choice.  Say Yes to the Positive.

Happy Monday!!  We’re Almost there…